Saturday, March 3, 2012

mint tea and slivers

my heart heavy
with a love 
i was not yet strong enough
 to hold
all i wanted 
was to grow old with you
sip mint tea
 under the stars

swing on the porch
listening to the lull of the cars
 on the highway
 about moons that waned
while our souls rained
childhood dreams

while i was carving my heart
 to fit your key
i lost sight of the me
you needed me to be
and so our love grew grey
and drifted away

and what i wanted you to say
was that no matter what
it'd be ok
we'd be ok
but that's not the way it works, is it?
shit happens
vows break

who woulda known
that an innocent mistake
might take us out of the fold of forever
turning a lifelong endeavor
into yesterday's news

i'd like to believe
we choose our fate
that as we grate bone
to fill fleshy fears
tears might bleed us back to clay

i laugh
who would stay
to wade through knee-deep madness
who would have enough patience
to bear the weight
of static sadness

who wouldn't run
at the first sight of silence
who wouldn't break free
from chains that only stain
sentiments better suited for postcards

alone i stay
collecting shards of half truths
painted just the way i like them
slivers of hope 
that still sting when I breathe

and all i can do is believe
clench fragments of dreams
crazy glue promises we made
to the blades i hone chaos with
wrap myself in your voice

make the choice to sever
to weather the storm inside my gut
and for all but a moment 
of false sanity
not regret stripping myself down bare

and as i prepare to take my leave
careful not to breath
 the dust of my own devastation
without a single moment of hesitation
i walk away

into the darkness of light
no longer willing to fight
for this

eyes closed
as the distance between us grows
i blow you one last kiss
from my heart

so it is
that we must part
start to live again
heal the wounds of want
holding tight to the hope
that one day
we’ll free ourselves
from ego chokeholds
and learn be friends

the poetry industry

the poetry industry
where hearts have become commodities 
and pure love is now an oddity
we are the prodigies of our words
begging to be heard
by any soul
that may create the illusion 
of us feeling whole
we seek to fill our man-made voids
like toys
tinkered with 
and tossed
we seduce our own minds
till all humanity is lost
to the rhythm of delusion 
we succumb 
to intoxicating profusion 
of false gods
our egos 
we stroke 
held in a delirious daze
until death